Required reading

Module I — A Brief History of the Discipline

The candidate will demonstrate familiarity with the historical context of the discipline, beginning with the introduction of the M3 in 1986 and continuing through the contemporary era, in which the practitioner is expected to be conversant in the relative merits of the X5 and the X7 without ever having driven either. The candidate is reminded that the discipline is not about the car. It is about a posture toward driving.

Module II — The Turn Signal: Its Role and Its Optionality

The turn signal is best understood, by the practitioner, as a courtesy extended to other drivers, and one which is, in the spirit of efficient operation, frequently waived. The candidate will be examined on the canonical exceptions: the highway lane change conducted during the change rather than before; the merge negotiated through eye contact rather than indicator; and the parking-lot maneuver, in which the signal is, by long custom, omitted entirely.

Module III — Lane Discipline and the Left Lane

The advanced practitioner does not yield the left lane. The candidate will demonstrate proficiency in the maintenance of speeds appropriate to the practitioner’s own urgency rather than the posted limit, and in the steady, implicit pressure on the vehicle ahead, communicated through the closing of following distance to a thoughtful three to four feet.

Module IV — Tailgating as Communication

The candidate will achieve fluency in the principal forms of automotive non-verbal communication: the firm but brief honk, the high-beam pulse, the sustained high-beam, and the most advanced of the canonical forms, the sustained left-lane drift to within one car-length, accompanied by sustained eye contact at the point of overtaking.

Module V — Parking: The Two-Spot Solution

The advanced practitioner is reminded that the cost of a corrective bodywork estimate exceeds, in present value, the cost of a single additional parking space at the time of arrival. The candidate will demonstrate proficiency in the diagonal occupation of two adjacent spaces, ideally the two furthest from the entrance, and in the polite-but-firm response to subsequent commentary.

Module VI — Final Considerations

The graduate is expected to maintain a working relationship with at least one detailing service, to know the tire-pressure specifications by heart, and, under no circumstances, to use a car wash that runs the vehicle through brushes.